I was about to send a long CW'ed mental health post but I closed my phone in campus mess without drafting and tusky lost it. It was about a crappy week I've had and not measuring upto the standards I'd have held myself to a few years ago

This is a larger sign from the universe for me to stfu and just work on myself instead, I suppose... since I feel a bit better now

One more win and we're back. Hoping this one goes well.

Basically I felt that after being burnt out from a terrible trimester(last to last term) and healing, I was unable to take normal reasonable amounts of criticism without it feeling like a personal insult, misinterpreting sarcasm, things like that

My work is a lot more mediocre than earlier as well which is a troublesome combo, and my fundamentals are surface level at best

I want to do what I do but it feels like I loved the me that loved the idea of it rather than that itself.

I still enjoy many parts of it but I need breathing room which I have a habit of not giving myself. I can continue to blame my old college for this but that's not even close to the full picture

Anyways, the fog cleared and I have a path forward at the very least in what to work on

@SpaciousCoder78 do you have any minor or major changes you did to your life outside of commitments managing that helped?

I feel like it's hard to be excited for things sometimes

I still want to do it... like I regret things not going my way when they don't, getting lost in thought or fears about performing, etc like i still care internally

It did :)

@SpaciousCoder78 interesting

I keep failing to do that

Every time I become a bit more free, I "recover" and try to bounce back only getting burned again

@SpaciousCoder78 tech/engineering adjacent? (If you don't mind sharing ofc, I respect it if you don't want me to pry)

I know what you mean but I feel weirdly trapped because what I do(I can't really put it in a box, strangely) is all I have

I don't do sports, I don't have friends outside of hobbies, etc

Take away what I do and I feel like I'm nothing which is... scary

@SpaciousCoder78 oh btw are you coming to indiafoss tomo?

@SpaciousCoder78 I can respect that